Failure is not final, it’s feedback

I tossed the ball in the air, reached my racket back, and missed the ball. This was about the 30th time I’d thrown the ball in the air to serve, but had been unsuccessful. I wanted to give up and throw the racket down. Josh kept saying, “keep your head up.” This was in regards to watching the racket and the ball make contact. In my mind it meant keep fighting even though the negative thoughts about not being good enough were creeping in. Tennis today felt off. I knew why, it was because I was on a court where I felt exposed. My mind raced that people were watching me and my terrible shots. Of course, every time I missed I deflected my mistake by making a joke.

The problem with my serve was hesitation. I hesitate before I hit the ball because I’m afraid of doing it wrong, afraid of feeling like a fool, and afraid to try. Why is it when we learn something new we’re terrified of failure? We don’t want to put ourselves in a situation that is unfamiliar because we’re afraid others will see our faults.

I knew I had to keep trying to serve. Thank goodness I have a supportive husband. I probably hit 100 serves tonight, but it finally started to make sense. It’s not perfect, but it’s something I have to continue to work at. My experience today reminded me that at  this moment in my life things are new, terrifying, and in a constant state of change. I’m terrified of failure and people thinking I’m not good enough. The thing is I have to keep pushing myself to be the best and not listening to the fear. I know it’s held me back from meeting people, from being a better photographer, and from being myself.

I’m going to keep throwing that ball in the air and reaching for it. It’s not always going to be successful, but I’m trying, I’m fighting and I’m learning every step of the way.

Murray and Pearl. I’m not sure why Murray looks scared but he is a little weird.


Megan and Corey The Album

I’m excited to share Megan and Corey’s wedding album with you. There wedding was full of love and emotion. The whole family was in tears when Megan walked down the isle toward Corey. I love when clients purchase wedding albums because they tell a beautiful story. It’s so easy to just get the dvd and let it sit there. I have a lot of clients who even feel overwhelmed by the all the photos and don’t know where to begin. I’ve done the same with my own wedding photos. An album lets you experience your wedding over and over, plus I love designing them and it takes all the work off you!

All my albums are predesigned, which means I put the album together for you, and you let me know what photos you would like to swap out. It’s an easy process, and let’s you get all your favorite photos in there. Enjoy their album design. I know I love looking at it over and over, and they do too!

Click on their photo below to flip through the album.


Danielle and Sean

I second shot this wedding for my friend Jeff Pope (I like to call him old man Jeff to give him a hard time). This wedding was beautiful and on a perfect cooler July day.

Few of my favorite things about this wedding:

- Danielle is a designer and had fabulous details

-Her puppy stayed next to her the entire time she was getting ready

- They remembered immediate members of their family that passed away by having family walk down the isle with flowers and their photos.

- Pioneer Columns in Lincoln is a perfect place to get married

- They had one of the most unique cakes I’ve ever seen

- Details, Details, Details

- There was a lot of love.

- Pink shoes!

- Cute kisses after the cake was cut

- She totally knew how to throw the bouquet!

Pink Shoes!

Celebrating with mini bottles of champagne

Her parents look on with love.


This is their cake. Pretty cool!

Love little kisses after the cake.


Leah Bockelman - Simply lovely, as always! :)

For all the organized people. Holla!

It’s true, I’m one of those ridiculously organized people. The problem is I appear unorganized just to throw people off. I always laugh when I get emails that say, just a reminder that blah is coming up, what do we need to do? I’ve had it on my calendar for months, it’s all I think about, I just have to get motivated to do the emailing on a certain date listed on said calendar. My life feels out of order when I don’t have every task written down on a check list. I even add completed tasks to the list just to check it off and feel uber accomplished. It’s sickening, I know, ask my husband. I’ve been a paper list person for years. The problem is I write and rewrite these lists as things change. I also have the habit of losing my lists. grr. It’s always the grocery lists too! I’ve downloaded a lot of different droid aps in hopes of finding the right system. FINALLY a system called Evernote appeared. It’s my new fall love (watch out Josh). We’ve already spent hours together organizing for my trip to Omaha, brainstorming ideas for engagement sessions, and researching health insurance policies. The amazing thing about it is that I have the program on all my computers which sync to each other and my phone. You can take screen shots from the web just by clicking a button which saves to Evernote. I can also take a photo of a receipt with my droid and it downloads. Yes, I’m giddy writing this.


Another great system is called “our groceries.” You write your grocery lists and cross off the items while you are shopping. No more losing lists for me! It does synch between smartphones, however Josh is several decades behind so it doesn’t work.

Are there any other organized nerds out there? What is your favorite thing to keep you organized? You’d make my day sharing what you use!

rachel - i too write what i’ve already accomplished on my list so i can have the satisfaction of checking it off :)

amber - love it! i have one lone notebook where EVERTHING gets written down in. call me old school, but i like the pen and paper thing. god help me if i ever loose that notebook though.

josh solar - Jenny is exactly like that. I’m not, but I’m glad that she is :)

Enjoy Where You're At

Today I felt stretched to the max, similar to the strech armstrong I had as a kid.  I wanted to be negative and be all “life isn’t fair.” I want to be the greatest person I can be for myself, but life throws road blocks and I find myself trying to maneuvering around them.

Today started with Josh going for a run. The weather was overcast, which is not normal for the desert. Josh was gone for 10 minutes when I looked down at my phone to see a severe weather storm. I wrote it off thinking weatherbug was having a moment. Then a few minutes later hail poured down. It sounded like the house was being attacked. My first thought was hopefully Josh is not laying on the side of the road because he was knocked out by massive hail. He called me a few minutes later safe from the local walgreens and needed me to pick him up once the storm stopped.

Finally there was a calm to the storm. I hopped in the car thinking it would be an easy drive. I headed down the street to a massive pool of water. There was no way I could cross it in my small civic. Then I turned around and headed the other way to a street light down and a huge car in the way. I turned again to more water. I yelled in my car, “come on!” I finally figured out a way to avoid the water, big truck, and street lamp to find a way to get Josh.

It’s little moments like today that remind me I can handle what’s ahead. I think in life it’s easier to look ahead toward the future hoping that things will be easier and better. There is a plan for my life. I don’t know what it is. A few of the roadblocks I feel currently are learning to reach out to others, not taking the little things personally, not believing in myself and my abilities, and focusing on the negative.   So instead of being negative I’m going to enjoy where I am at this moment, no matter how hard life feels. The scrubs quote below sums it all up. We all know the show scrubs is an expert on life’s situations and problems!

“I usually don’t like thinking about the future. I mean let’s face it, you can’t predict what’s going to happen. But sometimes, the thing you didn’t expect is what you really wanted after all. Maybe the best thing to do is stop trying to figure out where you’re going and just enjoy where you’re at.” JD Scrubs

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